I’m Not Ready

Dear Gay Agony Uncle

I’ve been seeing a lovely guy for just under a year. I really like him, however he’s pushing for us to move in together. This is something I’m wary of. I have a lovely home with everything where I want it. I like him to stay the weekend, but then like to have my own space during the working week.

He lives with friends in a house share, but two are moving out in a few months and he doesn’t like the other housemate.

I’m not adverse to living together, but at the moment I don’t feel ready, plus it feels as though it’s because of the situation rather than the relationship is at the stage to be together.

How do I let him know I’m not ready?

Rob E


My answer is explain what you have so eloquently put in your letter. You like to share your life, and don’t feel ready to share your home.

Perhaps suggest giving it another year and put it up for discussion at the end of 2018. However, if at that point you are not ready to move in, then it may be worth considering that you are not a moving in together type of person.

Many relationships flourish living apart, however some do flounder.

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